Fire Alarms and Road Trips

Ah, March went out like a lion for my family ... I guess I can't expect to have an uneventful life, can I?

Last Tuesday, March 27th, Little Man and I stuck to our usual routine. His OT came by at 10 am (he has sensory issues) and after his session we were both wiped. But for some reason, after he had lunch, I decided to sanitize his pacifiers by boiling them. You're supposed to let it boil for 5 minutes, so I left the pot unattended while I put Little Man down for his nap (around 12:15 pm). But instead of going right back downstairs, I sat down in my bedroom and started to watch TV. I was chilled so I put my space heater on. After a few minutes, I smelled something and shut of the heater, thinking it was a short. But then the fire alarm went off!!!!

Instantly I remembered that I had been boiling the pacifiers. I ran downstairs into the kitchen and there were FLAMES shooting out of the pot! I just panicked. I put a lid on top of the pot but it was too big and didn't fully put out the fire. There was smoke everywhere. Then the alarm company called and said to get out of the house (when I said I was having problems with the fire) and I ran back upstairs and grabbed Little Man, who was freaking out in his crib, and ran outside—no jacket for me, no shoes for Little Man. I tried to leave him in the car so I could go back to check on the dogs, but he freaked again. I got so upset thinking the dogs would be hurt. But the police and fire departments were there within minutes and my neighbor from across the street opened her home so we could warm up. I babysat for her kids as a teenager, so she's known me for ages. But it was nice, since I haven't really spoken to her since then. The fire was contained to that pot and it was put out quickly and the smoke dissipated after a few hours. But no nap for Little Man and I canceled his afternoon DI session.

I was so angry at myself for being so careless. But I've learned to forgive myself and I'll never leave a pot unattended again.

That week was also Dude's last week of working in NYC. I hope after he adjusts to the new job, he'll be much happier. Especially with the 25 minute commute vs. 2 hour (each way). He started yesterday, so I guess we'll see.

Anyway, we also took a road trip to NoVA to attend a wedding on 3/31. We went down on Thursday morning and met a friend for lunch outside of Baltimore, on the way down. We stayed at the Ritz-Carlton in Tyson's Corner, Virginia. It was amazingly kid friendly. While expensive, I highly recommend the hotel chain if you can afford it. (For us, it was a splurge.)

We met a friend of mine and her son on Friday morning and then took a trip to the National Air and Space Museum Steven F. Udvar-Hazy Center in the afternoon. It was pretty neat to see the Space Shuttle and the Enola Gay. Parking is $15 but free after 4 pm, which is when we got there.  And the 1.5 hours until it closes at 5 is definitely enough time to see most of the exhibits.

On Saturday morning I had a massage and a manicure. Dude took Little Man to a local park.  He refused to nap after lunch so we actually took a drive so he would sleep—since the wedding was that night. He fell asleep the minute we got onto the highway and we actually drove into Washington D.C. We saw, from the car, the Washington Monument, the Jefferson Memorial and the remnants of the Cherry Blossoms (which had bloomed a week earlier than usual due to the early Spring). Then we headed back to Virginia and hit a grocery store so Little Man could eat before the wedding. It was a good call since he wasn't going to eat any of the items on the menu.  And he did amazingly well at the wedding. For a 2-year-old to be up late and overstimulated... I'm just amazed that he made it through the wedding cake (but not the other dessert) and that he even danced a bit.

The drive home was quick, which is a rarity for 1-95. I'm just glad that this road trip was much more successful than prior ones. We've learned that he cannot be in the car for much longer than 2 - 2.5 hours and that he has to be down for his nap BEFORE 1 pm or he won't sleep at all. No more trips for us for a while. We're saving and paying down debt. And hopefully I'll find a new job soon, too.

Ch-ch-changes!

I can't believe it's been two weeks since I've posted. I'm behind once again with keeping up with my blog. Not sure why, since I've had the opportunity. But I guess it's because I've been trying to keep up with Little Man and my mom and have been feeling quite stressed and unmotivated.

But I have big news.

Dude got a new job and starts on Monday, April 2nd. The best part is that it's in New Jersey and is less than 10 miles away from our house. He won't be commuting for 4 hours per day and he'll have more time with Little Man (and me) and hopefully will feel more relaxed with all the extra time. It's also a promotion and pay increase. So hopefully this is the start of something positive for our family.

*I* also need to find a new job. It's time and with the economy as it has been, I really have to get my tush in gear to help better our family. I should have been looking more seriously for months, but I haven't.  So I've decided April 1st (Sunday) is the day to get myself back on track. It's going to be hard and it's very scary, but I'll do what I can to better secure our future. If I don't, we'll be in trouble. If I do, we'll be OK. It's that simple.

I'm not cut out to be a SAHM/WAHM combo. I need to be one or the other. I wish I could stay at home but even with the cost of living as it is in our area, I can't. Plus we have debt. More than I care to admit. So a new job is in our best interests.

Wish me luck.

What's That Sound???

The new thing that Little Man says to me every day since his myringotomy (ear tube surgery) last Thursday. I realize it's been a week and I haven't updated my blog. As you know, my mom is in a care facility after lung surgery and a feeding tube insertion from complications of Parkinson's Disease.

Anyway... last Thursday, March 1st, was the big day. Little Man was scheduled to be at the surgical center at 6:15 am. Since it was a half hour's drive, we had to be up at 5 am to shower and out of the door by 5:45 am. We got there right on time and found out that he was the first procedure.

The first issue was getting him in his surgical gown and these giant yellow socks (for a 2-1/2 year old). He did NOT like either. And even Daddy getting into HIS gown (to go into the OR with him) didn't make things better. What did?

STICKERS!

"Dowa! Dowa! Emmo! Bappap! Boots! Spiderman!"

We were told it would be quick but didn't realize HOW quick. I think his ENT was letting us know it went well only about 10 minutes after my husband came back from the OR (he stayed with him as the anesthesiologist put him out). Apparently there was a LOT of fluid in his right ear (less in the left) but it went well.  And when Little Man was brought out to us, he was SCREAMING.  My Little Man was PISSED OFF.  Apparently a common reaction post-anesthesia. It took him a good 15-20 minutes to calm down. It was us asking him if he wanted to go home that did it. He said "Outta here!" And so we went.  After we got him dressed, of course.

The last week has had it's ups and downs. The downs were A) putting antibiotic ear drops in his ears 3 times a day for 3 days. But we got through it. And B) bathing him. His ENT said no water can get into his ears and suggested either cotton balls with vaseline to create a seal or ear plugs. We did the plugs and he FREAKED. He literally was terrified by them and was shaking and crying. After two baths, I can't imagine doing it again. I'm not sure what to do.

BUT... the UPS. "What's that sound, Mama?"

He definitely can hear better. He repeats what we say. His words are clearer. And he's become even more of a chatterbox. So I feel glad that we helped him when he had a hearing problem. Hopefully his speech will improve even more over the next few weeks—and months. I'll let you know how it goes.

A Little Bit of My Childhood Passed Away

RIP Davy Jones.







I'm quite sad about this. It makes me think of my mom, too, who is only 3 years older than Davy Jones and her mortality. I haven't seen her since Monday and I just feel so sad.

Ear Tubes

So my son who never had chronic ear infections as an infant, though he has had three over the the last six months (and one sinus infection), is getting ear tubes on Thursday. He's getting them because he has "mild to moderate hearing loss" in both of his ears. I saw two different ENTs, the second opinion being a pediatric otolaryngologist. Both agreed that the tubes are the way to go, especially for a child with a speech delay.  I'm told he hears as though he has cotton in his ears. Muffled. So my husband and I agreed that it was for his benefit to do the surgery (with the pediatric otolaryngologist) and it's scheduled for this coming week.

This is the Mayo Clinic definition about the surgery: Ear Tubes

Little Man's speech therapist feels that the loss hasn't hindered his progress, but she also is interested to see if the tubes help with his diction. I'm not sure how it will help his speech—or even his balance, which is somewhat poor—and if the tubes will aid his development. Hopefully it will. But at the very least, we'll be fixing his hearing and that's a good thing.

The main things I'm worried about after this procedure are

1. Little Man being in pain
2. Little Man being scared
3. Bathing him after the tubes, because he'll need ear plugs to protect his ears

I am somewhat prepared for the post anesthesia reaction since he, sadly, had surgery when he was 11 months old for an unresolved Hydrocele. It was rough. He was screamed and was inconsolable for quite a while. At the time, he still drank formula and he needed two bottles to settle down, after the fast and the surgery.  Little Man is older now and understands SO much. I guess I have to explain to him what's going to happen and hope for the best.  And have something for him to eat when he wakes up, if the nurses allow it.

I hate that he needs this, but I hope his hearing is much improved after the surgery.

My Mom

I know I wrote a brief update last week about my mom's hospitalization and how the last few weeks have affected me—and my whole family. But it was brief and I have a lot of thoughts that I feel I want to get off my chest. Though writing them down, publicly, is somewhat daunting.

Six years ago, I'd never have thought my mom would be lying in a bed in a nursing home, trapped in her own body. Unable to speak. Unable to move. Destroyed by Parkinson's Disease. Six years ago we took a mother-daughter vacation to Walt Disney World. We danced along with parades and ate ice cream at midnight after seeing Circe du Soleil. 

This is what we looked like:

My mom will never travel again.  That makes me so sad, because she loved to explore new places and see the sights. She loved seeing Broadway shows... but I don't think she'll do that either. Not unless she surprises all her doctors with an amazing recovery and isn't ashamed to go to a show in a wheelchair. And that's assuming a lot of things.

I blame myself for a lot of how my mom deteriorated. I saw it but turned a blind eye to things and let my dad say that she was OK. That she had seen doctors and, despite the weight loss, they didn't seem too concerned. But when my dad went to Houston on business that last Thursday of January, I knew things were much worse than I thought.

Due to the Parkinson's Disease, my mom lost her ability to swallow. The food and Ensure shakes she was eating/drinking went into her chest cavity and brought on Pneumonia. She had two surgeries in less than a week and the result is a most-likely permanent feeding tube and the risk of aspiration from being unable to swallow her own saliva.

It's not easy leaving her alone there. But I have an active 2-1/2 year old son to keep up with. He has a lot of his own challenges—the most recent is hearing loss from the fluid in his ears and possible surgery (tubes) to fix it. So I am quite overwhelmed by it all and haven't found the balance yet. I hope I do soon.

Brief Update

My mother was in the hospital for 13 days.  She is currently in a subacute rehab facility and I'm not 100% confident that I made the right decision pressing for that location. She communicated that she was disappointed by her care. I'm hoping things will improve but if they do not, I will look to see where she can be moved. I am extremely worried about her future. I do not see how she can improve at this point. She cannot talk. She cannot swallow. She cannot move her body. She is mentally fine but with all the physical issues, it's taking an extreme emotional toll on her.

And I don't think I can manage it all without having a nervous breakdown. I have a 2.5 year old to take care of and dog and dinner and myself and my husband... I'm not sure how I'll do it all. And nobody else can really help me with this. Everyone else has their own lives and I can't ask them to put them on hold indefinitely. So my poor mother only sees me for an hour here and there and she is alone and unable to communicate.

I know I am doing my best and trying to advocate for my mom, but it's overwhelming.

I am soon off to an ENT for my son and it's like the day is never-ending. I would have napped but I was afraid I wouldn't have woken for the appointment. I am THAT exhausted. It's a good thing that I'm not working full-time now or I'd have lost it completely.

More thoughts later.