New Year's Reflections

Last year, on New Year's Eve, I was newly pregnant—only 8 weeks along—and so tired from the early pregnancy symptoms.

This year, on New Year's Eve, I'm a tired mom of an active infant. I'm in bed, typing away on my blog, just before 11 pm. And I hope to be going to sleep BEFORE the ball drops and it's 2010.

Overall, it was a great year.  The most amazing one of my life. In 2009 I went through most of my pregnancy and delivered a beautiful, happy baby boy. I shouldn't complain about anything... though there were ups and downs. Money woes. Little Man's brachycephaly and the helmet. My feelings of guilt.

And now as this year ends, so will my grandmother's long life.   She fought to be around, with her family, even though she would have liked to have followed my grandfather when he died in May of 2007.  But she was here to see me marry. To see me FINALLY become a mother. Momma has been such a huge influence in my life. And soon she will no longer be there for me to talk to. I have been blessed to have her for so long. It's her time and Hospice is taking care of her during her last days. But it doesn't make it easy.  And I'm sad that Little Man won't remember her at all.  But at least she got to know him. Got to love him. And that's a special thing.

So as this year ends—a new one begins.  I hope that the year ahead is full of wonderful discoveries for my son. For me, as I watch him. For my husband, who needs a new path. And the coming year brings to me a new decade. I'll turn 40...  Well, that's not something I'm that thrilled with.  But I hope that the New Year is truly a Happy one.